Hypercast: An ADHD Podcast
Hypercast is your companion through the world of ADHD, offering an authentic and engaging look at life with ADHD. Join ADHD coaches Melissa and Brianna as they navigate the complexities of ADHD with heart, humor, and expert insights. From discussions on the latest research to personal stories of triumphs and struggles, Hypercast delves deep into every facet of ADHD.
Whether you're newly diagnosed, a long-time ADHDer, or someone who loves and supports an ADHDer, this podcast is for you. We explore a variety of topics, from ADHD relationships, late diagnosis, and co-occurring conditions to practical advice on everyday challenges.
Hypercast provides a supportive space for open, honest, and well-informed conversations about ADHD, including the cultural misconceptions and stigmas surrounding it. Melissa and Brianna share strategies, tools, and encouragement to help listeners thrive and navigate a world not built for their neurodivergent minds.
Tune in for insightful discussions, real-life experiences, and resources to help you along the ADHD journey, and know you're not alone. Hypercast is your auditory haven, bringing community and understanding to every episode.
Hypercast: An ADHD Podcast
ADHD Culture: Finding Strength in ADHD Community
Have you ever felt like an outsider in a world not designed for your mind? Brianna and Melissa sure have, and that's why they're opening up the conversation about ADHD culture in the latest episode of Hypercast. They're tearing down the negative stereotypes and celebrating the vibrant energy of being neurodivergent. From their own stories of isolation to the triumphant discovery of community, they share how finding your tribe can turn the tide from self-doubt to self-love.
In a candid exchange, our hosts shed light on the emotional rollercoaster of embracing neurodiversity. They discuss the liberating shift from viewing ADHD as a deficit to recognizing it as a unique asset. Their heartfelt anecdotes aim to comfort and inspire, highlighting the journey from struggling with misconceptions to basking in the glow of acceptance and pride.
This episode peeks into the subtle yet profound ways people with ADHD cultivate connections, from parallel play to the joy of shared spontaneous adventures. Brianna and Melissa also discuss navigating the treacherous terrain of a neurotypical society, offering solidarity and strategies to thrive in settings that often overlook the needs of ADHDers.
Remember, you're not alone—this episode is your invitation to a community that "gets it", one that celebrates every quirk and triumph on the ADHD path.
Melissa's Contact:
Email: melissa@likemindcoaching.com
www.likemindcoaching.com
Brianna's Contact:
Email: info@understandingadhd.ca
www.understandingADHD.ca
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Hi, there you're listening to Hypercast, an ADHD podcast. I'm Melissa, an ADHD coach and advocate. Hi.
Brianna:I'm Brianna, an ADHD coach and soon-to-be therapist. We are here to explore all things ADHD from unexpected challenges to unique strengths.
Melissa:Join us as we share insights and strategies that empower you to live your best ADHD life.
Brianna:Ready, let's dive into today's episode. First of all, welcome to.
Melissa:Hypercast. And Melissa, I love that you put on a podcast voice.
Brianna:Do you know that? Oh yeah, I'm absolutely sure. Red leather, yellow leather, that type of thing.
Melissa:Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers A pe pack of pickled peppers. I can usually do it. See, now I'm nervous and I'm being watched. Don't worry, I'll close my eyes. Go again. Peter Piper picked a pack of pickled peppers. A pack of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked. If Peter Piper picked a pack of pickled peppers, then where's the pack of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?
Brianna:Hey, welcome back to Hypercast, am I right? Today's topic is what is ADHD culture, and we're very excited to talk about that today. Can you tell me, melissa, why you think this topic is important?
Melissa:Why yes, brianna, I can tell you why this topic is important. We're not going to get anywhere Too many giggles. Honestly, today's topic is really important because people with ADHD often feel really lonely and left out in the world, and I know this personally. So often I can be at a party and feel like I'm a fish out of water. I don't like small talk. I often find it hard to talk to people about the topics I enjoy, and just being in the world sometimes feels a little bit lonely.
Brianna:I would like to shine a light on this topic because it is this is my soapbox, this is my topic. It's so important to understand that you're not alone, you're not broken, that the world wasn't built for you, that you don't have to do things the way that everyone else does them, just because that's the way it is for everyone else. If you can do something your own way that's unique to you, that you enjoy doing, and find people who do it your way too, so you don't feel so alone, so you feel like you're a part of a community, and finding that of like, acceptance and empathy and understanding is so important. So if we can overcome this whole like it's a disease, it's means you're broken, it means you're not trying hard enough, it means you're lazy all that type of like, microaggression, nonsense and really dive into the like, community aspect of ADHD culture and really find your home, find your people, find your niche, like I think we would be thriving.
Melissa:I've never really considered that ADHD could be considered a culture.
Brianna:Okay, that's fair. A lot of people haven't thought of that because society thinks that culture is only like oh, you're Indian, that's your culture. Or like your like religion, like is kind of a culture as well. But like coffee, culture exists True. Musical nerds like musical theater nerds that's definitely a culture. You can definitely tell who's into musical theater just by singing a couple notes from like Kath or like the Newsies, and people will show you who they are. So in that way it's not any less than any other culture, right? Culture is not ethnicity. Culture is just a group of people who all enjoy the same thing, who get along because they all have similar values or similar interests or similar ways of expressing and living in the world. What is ADHD if not a culture True?
Melissa:Yeah, I guess there's part of it that I'm in my 40s and feel like I've lived my whole life and have never really embraced my ADHD as a positive thing all the time. I think more recently definitely I have, but the bulk of my life has not been embracing ADHD in a positive way.
Brianna:Well, unfortunately, you probably grew up in the time period where ADHD was considered a disability, something that you were supposed to be medicated for, something that was treated, that we were searching for a cure for, and not until very, very recently did we understand that. It's just a difference. It's just a difference in the way that your brain works. It's not something that we need a cure for. Yes, there are struggles, but there's also positive sides of it. It's just different. You know, and it used to be. It used to be that this medical model of disability was all about like, oh, how can we fix you? How can we treat you? How can we cure you? Like poor you, so sad that you have this thing. If only you didn't have this thing, then you could be a whole human and you could be better. That hurts, like. For me, that's insulting to hear someone say like if only you didn't have this crucial part of who you are, you could be a whole person, better person.
Melissa:Honestly, that's the mentality I've grown up believing or people have thought about me that I'm different, or, like you said, I'm not a whole person, I'm lacking yeah, what about my ADHD makes me any less than you?
Brianna:yeah, like there's not like it's not like it's not like cancer. Right, it's not something that will kill me. It's something that I love about myself that makes me see the world in a unique way that makes me an interesting person, gives me part of my personality, gives me some of my interests. It dictates how I see the world and that informs who I am and I'm proud that I am an ADHD individual. I am proud of that.
Melissa:It took me time, but I am to the point where I am also proud now. I felt for a long time it was, it was something I would shy away from sharing with others. Yep, shameful.
Brianna:Keep it hidden. Don't tell anyone. No one can know. Masking all the time.
Brianna:Never let anyone seeing which is exhausting what you're truly yeah, so, yeah, yeah, it's awful to have all of this, like to have that shame from society and that view of like you know it's something that can be cured or fixed or it needs to be fixed. And having all of that be what society has told you and then having that internalized, like having that belief become what you believe about yourself. Because if you were constantly told that you were lesser and less worthy and not as good, and you start to believe that about yourself and you start to feel hopeless and you start to feel like you're the problem rather than society, yeah, and that's why culture is so important. You're the problem rather than society. Yeah, and that's why culture is so important. This cultural understanding of understanding that it is just a culture, it is a part of who we are, it is just a difference that we're born with, and having that community, having that acceptance, having that understanding, is so important.
Melissa:Having that understanding is so important, and there are so many downsides to having ADHD, because it's not all sunshine and roses, but I do think there are some positives. People with ADHD have a lot of strengths we can be creative. We can be out-of-the-box thinkers. We can be calm in a crisis when others can't be. There are a lot of things that we naturally excel at crisis when others can't be. There are a lot of things that we naturally excel at, and when those things are harnessed and used in an effective way, it can be beneficial to the people around us, our communities, at our jobs.
Brianna:But if we are being held back because of our executive functions or because of, like, the disability aspect of it, or because society has not been built for us, that doesn't offer the supports that we need in order to utilize our strengths, that's when we suffer, right, like that's the environmental fit model, just talking about that briefly. Like that's when you believe that society just wasn't built for you, wasn't designed for you, and that's what's keeping you from excelling or succeeding yeah, which has some merit. Society definitely wasn't built for us, it was definitely built for the neurotypicals and we definitely suffer as a result of society. Just, you know all of the sitting still for eight hours a day in a classroom or at work, all the forms you have to fill out to function, all the executive functioning, decision-making skills you have to do on the daily, and we've lacked this community aspect of like. You know outsourcing some of the things that we're not good at and you know focusing on the things that we are good at, and that's really important.
Melissa:Yeah, I feel sometimes like it's really really, really hard living day to day with ADHD and, like you were saying you could outsource things. And then there's, but there's that, that voice in the back of my head that's like why can't you just do it? And then I end up with a backlog of things that I should be able to do.
Brianna:Right, yeah, Should is a terrible word. Do not should on yourself.
Melissa:Don't should all over yourself.
Brianna:people You've said to me multiple times yeah, but that's partly the internalized discrimination and partly the just barrage of microaggressions that we've received throughout our lifetime. Why are you so lazy? Are you even listening to me? Are you even trying? If you only tried harder, can you stop fidgeting? It's distracting. Or, oh, my personal favorite, take a chill pill. That one upsets me.
Melissa:The hairs on the back of my neck are like going up listening to you say these things, because I'm hearing echoes from my past and, like all the people that have ever said these things to me, yeah.
Brianna:You're overreacting. It's not that big of a deal. You're so disorganized, do you even care? Like, of course we care, of course we want to not be struggling like this, of course we want to have life be easy. But it's not, yeah, right, like.
Brianna:That's why that like whole superpower mentality that some people have around adhd. Like adhd is a superpower, yeah, but it's also a disability. It's both and it can be both and it's allowed to be both. It doesn't have to be one or the other, which is why the value neutral model is my favorite model. It's the one that combines. Like this is a disability. Like you actually are like worse at things because of the way that your brain functions, but also the environment plays a role. And if you had more support, then you wouldn't be as bad at those things, right, like, if we had that support that we were talking about, if we had that community outreach, those outsourcing or like a friend, a buddy system, all these skills that we can employ with ADHD, we had all that and we wouldn't be suffering as much and we could really focus on our strengths and our positives and be the best people we could be.
Melissa:Hearing that, one thing that's coming up for me is, if I look back to the person I was in my youth, I would automatically feel like I was being a burden by asking for help that I was undeserving, maybe because no one else needed that special thing. So why do I require some special assistance? Why do I require handholding? Why do I require it when no one else needs it?
Brianna:Yeah, and denying yourself the accommodations, denying that you have a disability. Some people still, to this day, don't view ADHD as a disability. They don't acknowledge the complexity and the depth with which it impacts us. And, yeah, just the same, as you like, even though I've known for a long time about, you know, disability advocacy and things like that, I've still struggled with that. Oh well, I shouldn't ask for help, because I should be able to do this by myself, because other people can do this by themselves and they don't seem to struggle with it. And that's if we had that community and had that group that we could talk to and be like, hey, is anyone else struggling with this? And other people are like, yeah, I struggle with that all the time and like here's my strategy for it, or like, oh, I didn't know everyone else was struggling with this. I didn't realize it was a thing that I could ask for help around or that, you know, I wasn't alone in my struggling. I wasn't alone in my suffering.
Melissa:Or, and some of us who are older that didn't get treatment until we were older, not feeling shame and yeah, like you said, not feeling alone and learning how to embrace our strengths and embrace, like, the positive parts of ourselves. That's very important. I think one of the words for that is grief, because we can grieve our past selves If we could have accepted ourselves earlier, what we could have done or accomplished or the place we could be mentally right now.
Brianna:Yeah, that's absolutely the word for it. I have several friends who were just diagnosed, just starting on their ADHD journeys, just starting understanding, maybe starting medication, things like that as well. And you know, there is this celebratory aspect of oh my God, my whole life makes sense. Everything that I've ever struggled with has a reason. It's not just me, I'm not broken, like everything makes sense. But then there's also that grief aspect that you were talking about. I was like if I had only known earlier, if I had only been helped or understood earlier, I could have avoided all of this pain, all of this suffering.
Melissa:I could have been so much further in my life and grieving that person that you could have been and then coming out of that grief is embracing the person who we are now and accepting and loving that person we are now yeah, yeah, that's huge loving yourself, not despite or in spite of, but like encompassing it, like it's not in spite of adhd.
Brianna:I love myself, but no, no, I love myself and my ADHD.
Melissa:I love all of me. We are one. I love all of me.
Brianna:I love all of me. Yeah, exactly, and being a part of that community is the start of how you can do that right, because you'll find like-minded people who understand, who are empathetic, and your values and the way that your ADHD presents will be a part of what makes you the group right. It's a part of what helps you fit in socially in that culture, right. Your little quirks and differences aren't different if they're the majority, right? Like, if you're trying to exist in a neurotypical culture and you don't fit in, why not find your people right? Like, why not find a place where you do fit in, where you don't feel so broken, where you can start to work on loving yourself and building a positive relationship to what has been previously told that you were broken or something that needed to be fixed?
Melissa:Often in a group of neurotypicals. When I start talking about my varied interests and hobbies that I'm actually pretty proficient at, I sometimes get this look from them that says there's no way you can do all those things. But when I walk into a room with people who have ADHD, I may find people that love woodworking, like I do, and love dancing and love to do all these little weird things that I love, and we can talk for hours.
Brianna:Yeah, there's actually language differences between neurotypical and neurotypical people. Yeah, the way that we communicate is different, which is another aspect of what makes us a unique culture, and it's things that you've heard before, like no eye contact, blunt, straightforward language, but also things like you were talking about with your hyper fixations and your special interests and like info dumping about a topic. You go into a room of like ADHD people and you're like, hey, does anyone know about marine biology? Someone's going to tell you about their favorite prehistoric fish and how it's evolved nowadays and how it relates to river otters. And you've gone on a journey of learning and it was entertaining and engaging the whole time because they're so passionate about it. And I feel bad for the small talk to our typical people who are like oh, how's the weather? How are the kids? Like that must be a boring life, you know.
Melissa:So sad. Our lives are so full and rich. I think one of the great things about having ADHD is that I personally find new and wonderful things about the world every single day, and I love learning and I find the world and life interesting.
Brianna:We definitely retain more of that childlike wonder. I feel like the neurotypicals are are missing out on that and they don't take time for play or for joy because they feel like they shouldn't, they feel like they have responsibilities. Oh, I'm not, whereas I am still sparked by things around me, like if I see bubbles, I'm very excited about the bubbles, and I'm not saying the neurotypical people don't have interests and don't, you know, go do things that they enjoy. I just feel like we embrace it more because we have this impulsivity and this hyperactivity and this drive to doing something interesting to trigger that dopamine response Right, whereas we are dopamine seeking machines and whatever form that takes is always filled with wonder and joy.
Melissa:And I think that's awesome. As kids, our job is to learn about the world through play, and I think that's one of the things that gets lost as we grow up, as we become adults, is that we stop exploring the world through play and we stop learning more about the world. I think our worlds become smaller if we just play by that neurotypical playbook and you just stop growing and learning and being excited about the world.
Brianna:Have you heard about the neurodivergent love languages? No, I haven't. So like there are love languages and it's like how people express love to each other and how people relate in the world, but for neurodivergent people it's slightly different. So we have info dumping, parallel play, support swapping please crush my soul back into my body. And I found this cool rock and I thought you would like it.
Melissa:Okay, Can you explain each of those? Because that and normally I don't say this Can you explain that a little slower for me?
Brianna:Yeah, no problem. It's just really interesting because, like you were talking about the way that you relate to the world, to people around you, right, and the typical love languages are like gift giving, words of affirmation, quality time, that type of thing I'm sure you've heard of those, but like the way that it translates to neurodivergent thing is just like it's just slightly more interesting, right. So, like info dumping is like telling your person like, oh my god, I learned this thing. I thought of you, I really wanted to share this information with you because I thought you would like it and you'd be really interested in this topic. And now we're having this really interesting discussion and it's bringing us like closer together. It's like growing our intimacy and our connection.
Brianna:Parallel play is like it's the quality time aspect of things. So basically, it's like I want to do my hobby or hyper fixation, I want to do woodworking and then I'm over here playing with like Legos or like doing paper origami, but we're still with each other, so we're still building that connection and that intimacy in the world. And like experiencing joy, even if we don't love the same thing, which is what neurotypicals are limited to. Like you're like oh, we both love the hockey. So we go to the hockey game and we drink beers and we sit at the hockey game or whatever.
Brianna:What if someone doesn't like hockey but they like you as a person? What do you do? You do two things at the same time. Ew, you do two things at the same time and it's easy. Now you can relate to that person and you're having a great time. Support swapping is like acts of service, so it's a great tool. Works with like body doubling, things like that. So if, like, I'm struggling to clean my house and you're really good at like organizing clothes or something like that, I am really good at organizing clothes.
Brianna:Like I'm well, you would organize my clothes and I would cook for you, and that's support swapping. So now we've done acts of service for each other and we've supported each other. Because we have this community and this culture, let's go. I love this idea. Please crush my soul back into my body is physical touch, but we have really heightened nervous systems, right like. We have that emotion dysregulation, whatever. So deep pressure therapy works really well for us. So, like a hug isn't going to cut it. I need you to crush my soul back into my body.
Brianna:It's one of my favorite things as a neurodivergent person and I found this cool rock that I thought you would like. Have you seen those like penguins or like the otters that like give little rocks and it's like the cutest thing's. It's gift giving is effectively like what that one is. It's just like I. I saw this thing and you know we're impulsive, we're distractible, right. So like I was in the store and I saw this and I was like, oh, my god, I found this little bee keychain and I know you love bees and I thought of you and I got it for you, rather than like, oh, you were telling me last month that you really wanted to read this book. That was a part of book club. Our memories aren't going to remember that you wanted to read this book from book club.
Melissa:I literally have downstairs. I have a pile, a hodgepodge of things that over the last month I've picked up from my mother-in-law for Mother's Day because I thought she would like them, and it's just this pile of little things, and so it's not just one big gift of oh I thought you may like this fourth or fifth robe to add to your wardrobe. It's these little things that I think that will bring her joy in her everyday life.
Brianna:Yeah, and isn't that amazing? Isn't like our way of relating to the world, slightly different than the neurotypicals, but it's so much more meaningful and impactful for us. And if you have a community of people who are just like you, then you'll have more access to ways of being loved that would make you feel connected and supported and embraced and loved.
Melissa:I love this idea of service swapping because my love language are acts of service and I love doing things for people. But sometimes it can deplete me of energy.
Brianna:Yeah, but it's like you want to show acts of service, you want to show that you love and care about someone, but if your energy reserves or your spoons are lower and you have to prioritize just your basic functioning, yeah, then that damages the relationship. Right? You're like I can't give you these acts of service that I really want to because I would be sacrificing my own health and my own life, whereas if you support swap, then you're both getting acts of service, you're both maintaining that connection and you're not depleting your energy.
Melissa:Yeah, and there are so many times if I think about trying to engage with somebody or get in touch with someone and I know that whatever we do will just deplete my energy. It will prevent me from even getting in touch with them. So this could be an opportunity to maintain my own energy and still spend time with someone. I also like the idea of doing different activities in the same room with someone. Oh, it's so much fun.
Brianna:I highly recommend it. It can even be as simple as like you're both playing video games, but different games, and then you're just like oh my god, look, I found this thing. Like oh my god, look, I found this thing, and you're not even playing the same game. But yeah, one of my favorite, favorite things to do with my fellow community members, my fellow ADHD people, is we will do like friendship dates that are like grocery shopping that's fun, right. Like we like go to a grocery store together, buy groceries, cook meals, and we'll like meal prep together, and then I'll cook one meal, they'll cook another meal, and then we'll eat together, right, and then we will have leftovers and we'll swap some of the leftovers. So now we have two separate meals. Right, it's easy, it's comfortable. You've accomplished something, you've spent time together. It beautiful that also.
Melissa:That also fits into the adhd need for novelty. So you cook a meal, you get some leftovers to take home and then you've got a new interesting dinner or lunch for tomorrow. That's really cool yeah, yeah, yeah.
Brianna:And it's something that you can have if you embrace adhd culture, you know, if you don't keep trying to deny yourself like, well, I can't invite my friend over to go grocery shopping or do my errands with me, like they wouldn't enjoy that, that wouldn't be fun, I have to do that by myself. Why?
Melissa:Sometimes just shifting the way that you're looking at something can make all the difference difference.
Brianna:Yeah, and that's my point with this culture Like it is a culture because there are unique and different ways that we do things, that we relate to each other, how we communicate. It's all unique to us, to neurodivergent people, right, and if you embrace that and you stop trying to exist in a culture that's not your own right, that you don't belong to, that you're always going to be on the outside of, or that you're masking really hard to fit into, like just shift your mindset to I'm not broken, it's a part of who I am.
Melissa:Yeah, it's making me think of ways like when I'm stuck at a party of neurotypicals, what can I do? The last party I went to, I ended up having a lovely conversation with someone who's really passionate about their job and that was the best part of my night. I don't know if he had ADHD, but he was just like focused in. He was passionate from the base of his being, like you'd see it shining from his pores and I just found that so inspiring, yeah.
Brianna:But that's what I'm talking about with like that info dumping or whatever. Like that level of passion for a topic is rarely seen in the neurotypicals. Yeah, I mean maybe if there's like a niche thing that they're really into and they really enjoy talking about, but they'll only talk about it with other people who are in that niche thing, so it never gets shared or expanded beyond that little niche, whereas it's not necessarily the topic that we're interested in. It's the passion behind the topic, and I could listen to anyone talk about anything.
Melissa:Like when someone's eyes light up and you can just see how excited they are. And this person I was talking to was like I love helping people and I had nothing but open ears for this person and I don't remember most conversations I had, but I remember most of this conversation. It's because of that passion.
Brianna:Yeah, Any conversation that starts with okay, so listen, is my favorite conversation.
Melissa:Because you got me, yeah, we're not always going to be with someone who has ADHD. You've got me, yeah, we're not always going to be with someone who has ADHD. So how can we embracing who we are as people with ADHD?
Brianna:how do we adjust our own personal lens in those times and moments? That's a great question. I would like to preface this by if you're in a safe environment, right, like if you're with people who you trust, who you feel safe around, then you can absolutely explain some parts of ADHD culture to them and see if they're receptive to the idea and if they're interested in participating. It's not like the neurotypicals can't do this. You just have to find someone who's willing to take the time to listen and to try it, and I know unfortunately there are still a lot of places and like some families, some cultures, some things just don't accept that ADHD is real or wouldn't accept you as you are. And please prioritize your own safety in terms of like. If you don't feel safe in this environment, if you feel like your job or your living situation or your safety is at risk, please just keep your mask on until you're with your people. But hopefully the world is going in a direction where there is more understanding.
Melissa:I'm just having a moment here, an aha moment, where I'm realizing that the level of relaxation I have around other people with ADHD or neuroatypicals it's the ICU moment and that I actually take a deep breath and my shoulders relax. I'm realizing this in this moment right now.
Brianna:Yeah, first of all, this is why peer review is such a valid way of diagnosing. I have ADHD, you 100 have adhd because, because I'm comfortable around you, because you are not instantly zapping my energy the second you walk in the room like there is this, just like subconscious understanding that, like what normal is is our version of normal rather than the neurotypical version of normal right, like the, the social expectations.
Brianna:Anything that you like want to to be doing is all the neurodivergent way rather than the neurotypical way, and it like there's some part of that. That just puts me at ease.
Melissa:I'm calmer, my anxiety doesn't spike like I don't know how to describe it, but if you know, you know I there have been many times where I would have to or at least I would feel for a neurotypical that I would have to explain things in depth, where it will take me one or two sentences to explain to someone with ADHD and I feel heard. I feel absolutely heard.
Brianna:Yeah, that feeling alone is worth being a part of the community. The culture embracing ADHD, just that feeling heard, feeling seen, feeling understood, just that alone, let alone all the other benefits we've already talked about, just that is so worth it for me.
Melissa:So why don't we sum things up? We started off. We were talking about some of the negative aspects of having ADHD in a neurotypical world.
Brianna:You can recap it can be really hard, yeah, yeah. No, it can be really hard. There's a lot of microaggressions, like society just simply isn't built for us, like the structure around, like how the world works, it just was built for neurotypicals by neurotypicals. Like that's the system that we have grown up in and it doesn't work for us. Like, and it impacts our education, it impacts our jobs and career options. It impacts our job longevity, right, like if you're with a boss and they don't explain why, or they're not understanding how you work or function, or giving you really boring jobs and you're not, you know, meeting the productivity quota.
Melissa:Or you're not getting there at the time. They need you to be there every day. I actually had one boss that I had a door I could close and when I closed the door he felt like I was not being part of the team or something, and I'm like, no, it's just helping me focus, yeah.
Brianna:Yeah, yeah. If there was just that little bit of understanding in, like your friends, in your family, in your job, in your education, by your teachers, whatever, it would be so incredibly helpful. And that's part of like what culture does it like, brings it to light, it builds groups, it makes you feel safe enough to start advocating to like change the world. You know, yeah, so yeah, those aspects of it, the microaggressions piece, all of that like being internalized and you starting to feel worthless and broken and helpless, and just that whole thing is so harmful. And then the flip side of if you embrace ADHD, if you embrace the culture, and you can find some really beautiful things there within, yeah, I think it's important to remember that, regardless of where you are on your ADHD journey, there are other people out there going through it too.
Melissa:You're not the only one. You are not the only one, and it can mean reaching out. I know, like Chad has peer group meetings. There are multiple meetings online that you could do as well.
Brianna:Yeah, I'm a part of several Facebook groups and, like we said, you just kind of like gravitate towards them. They just kind of like exist in nature and you're like this one feels safe. So I'm sure you have some people in your life that you could also turn to Story that I thought of when you were talking about. That is like I have a group of friends who was all recently diagnosed. All four of them were at that stage of I've just been diagnosed. I don't know what to do. I'm kind of grieving the loss of the person I could have been, but also I'm super excited and I want to talk about medications and I want to talk about what this is like and I want to talk about and they just ran with it this is.
Melissa:This is proof that that reaching out and being part of community is a vital part of self-acceptance on this ADHD journey yeah, and we talk about some crazy things in there.
Brianna:We talk about some like very personal things. So so it's the easy stuff, it's the fun stuff, it's the hard stuff, it's the trauma, it's the crying, it's the tears, it's a community.
Melissa:Well, this has been an awesome conversation. Unfortunately, I think we've come to the end of our podcast today. Thank you so much for listening and for joining us. Please stay tuned for our next podcast, where we will discuss getting the day started with ADHD. We'll see you soon, bye-bye, bye.
Brianna:Thanks for joining us on this episode of Hypercast, if you've enjoyed today's episode and want to stay connected, be sure to rate and subscribe, and check out the show notes for links to our social media and websites.
Melissa:Whether you're seeking practical tips, heartfelt stories or just a sense of community, hypercast is here for you.
Brianna:Remember you're not alone in your ADHD journey. Together, we can navigate the highs and lows with courage and compassion.
Melissa:So until next time, take care, stay curious and keep embracing your unique neurodiversity. Catch you on the next episode of Hypercast.
