Hypercast: An ADHD Podcast
Hypercast is your companion through the world of ADHD, offering an authentic and engaging look at life with ADHD. Join ADHD coaches Melissa and Brianna as they navigate the complexities of ADHD with heart, humor, and expert insights. From discussions on the latest research to personal stories of triumphs and struggles, Hypercast delves deep into every facet of ADHD.
Whether you're newly diagnosed, a long-time ADHDer, or someone who loves and supports an ADHDer, this podcast is for you. We explore a variety of topics, from ADHD relationships, late diagnosis, and co-occurring conditions to practical advice on everyday challenges.
Hypercast provides a supportive space for open, honest, and well-informed conversations about ADHD, including the cultural misconceptions and stigmas surrounding it. Melissa and Brianna share strategies, tools, and encouragement to help listeners thrive and navigate a world not built for their neurodivergent minds.
Tune in for insightful discussions, real-life experiences, and resources to help you along the ADHD journey, and know you're not alone. Hypercast is your auditory haven, bringing community and understanding to every episode.
Hypercast: An ADHD Podcast
Stimming and ADHD: Self-Regulation, Sensory Overload, and Finding Balance
In this episode of Hypercast, we dive into the world of stimming and ADHD. Melissa and Brianna explore how stimming acts as a powerful self-regulation tool, helping neurodivergent individuals manage sensory overload and stay focused. We discuss the different types of stimming—visual, auditory, tactile—and offer tips on how to balance personal stimming needs with social expectations. Whether you're new to stimming or looking for ways to manage overstimulation, this episode provides practical insights into living with ADHD and finding what works best for you.
Melissa's Contact:
Email: melissa@likemindcoaching.com
www.likemindcoaching.com
Brianna's Contact:
Email: info@understandingadhd.ca
www.understandingADHD.ca
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Welcome to Hypercast.
Brianna:Welcome to Hypercast.
Melissa:Today we're talking about stimming Brianna. Why is stimming important? Why are we talking about this today?
Brianna:It's actually really important, at least to me, because I've been told in the past stop that, stop fidgeting, sit still. And it actually takes away from my ability to focus, learn, do my job and regulate my emotions. Stimming is voluntary movement in order to self-regulate, to self-soothe when you're in a situation that you find really overwhelming or whatever. The stimming behavior comes out more strongly when you're stressed, when you're anxious, when you're in a situation where you need to focus and you need to be able to expel some of that extra energy that comes along with ADHD, either internal or external, in order to do the task at hand. If you take away my ability to do that through telling me to sit still and shut up, or through stigma or public shaming or whatever, then you're actually taking away an accommodation and a need that I have in order to function in society.
Melissa:I think that's really interesting because I come from an era where in school everything you're saying now was discouraged Moving at all doodling on your papers, because that was just messing up your work. Like any weird movement was distracting. I got sent to the principal's office even detention for being a distraction because I moved in ways that made people uncomfortable. I'm amazed that people are allowed to move in classes now. That's just absolutely amazing.
Brianna:Yes and no. I was lucky enough to go to a high school where 50% of the student population had ADHD. It was the culture of the school that allowed people to just stand up and take a walk around the classroom. The teachers knew it was their way of listening and being more engaged in the class. And of course, you still had the impulsive behaviors of going over to chat with your friend and that was Nick's. If I was playing with a fidget toy or doodling and not making eye contact, they understood I was actually listening more than the kid making eye contact, because they were zoned out daydreaming right.
Melissa:This is showing the benefit of knowing what stimming is and what it can do for someone who has ADHD or an ND mind. Can you explain what stimming is and what it does for the ADHD brain?
Brianna:Yeah, so when you hear the word stimming you immediately associate it with autism. But it's very common in ADHD as well and it tends to be more like with the fidget toys or like the clicking the pen. I am a leg mover, like I am shaking the desk, and that can annoy people as well. So I do try and temper that. But yeah, so stimming is a voluntary self-soothing behavior and can be visual, auditory, tactile, verbal, oral. I had one person tell me that stimming was a tick and I was confused, because tics are involuntary movements and stimming is a voluntary self-soothing behavior. It comes up during periods of high stress.
Melissa:It's trying to regulate our emotions, regulate our bodies, regulate how we're feeling You're saying that tics are involuntary and that you may not know that you're doing them, but that stimming is voluntary voluntary and that you may not know that you're doing them, but that stimming is voluntary. But is it possible that, even though stimming is voluntary, it is something that we're doing subconsciously or that we're not fully aware of. It's just something that we do, stimming is a self-soothing, voluntary behavior.
Brianna:It can also be subconscious. It can also be very hard to deny yourself the stim, okay. So yes, there are periods where I will like, subconsciously or like unaware, where I'm doing the movement or doing or humming, or clicking or something, and someone else has to point out to me that I'm doing it and, as I've said, it's in high stress situations. It's trying to regulate, so it's pretty automatic, but it's not uncontrollable. I have the ability to stop at any time. I just have to recognize that I'm doing it, so it will happen subconsciously and then I become aware of it and then I can stop or adjust.
Melissa:You could voluntarily stop doing that or even maybe even transfer that thing.
Brianna:Yeah, you can transfer it to something else. If you're doing some kind of self-harming behavior with the nail picking or the nail biting, you can transfer that behavior to something else where a tick it's completely involuntary, you do not have control over it.
Melissa:Yeah, and I know for me I have a tendency to stim. When I'm in very deep hyper focus, I feel like all the ideas are rushing at me at once and I'm trying to funnel it through my brain. I end up stimming in those moments.
Brianna:Yeah, exactly Because it helps you focus. If you take that away, then you lose the ability to focus because our neurodivergent brain, if we don't have an outlet for that excess energy, when we're in that hyper focus train of I, have a million thoughts rushing in my head. If you don't have the ability to do something physical or verbal or auditory, or even like smelling things like candles can help, that type of behavior allows the other part of your brain to focus, because this part of the brain that wants to distract you is already distracted. It's hacking the brain, right? You're like oh, like this part's trying to distract me, I'll distract it with something shiny.
Melissa:So I can focus. And does it have to be something shiny? No, absolutely not. I like shiny things.
Brianna:It doesn't have to be something shiny? No, absolutely not. I like shiny things. It doesn't have to be something shiny. A lot of people tend to enjoy something visual as a stim as well. You've seen those fidget spinners, the ones that you spin, or whatever. There is a physical aspect to that. You can feel the balance of it, you can feel it moving, you spin it. That is a physical movement. But also watching it spin can also be a stim.
Melissa:A lot of people like fidget toys and I really don't like them. I find them overly stimulating and distracting. I do things to stim, but that's not necessarily my way of getting my energy out of me.
Brianna:The toys are just a tool, right, If you don't have any toys to stim with, you're going to find a different way to stim and the toys. It's an alternative, as I said, to some of the more harmful behaviors. If you're doing skin picking or nail biting, there's a little necklace that you can bite on a masticating toy to get that masticating stim. Yeah, there's like different things that you can use to like transfer harmful stims in toys, but if you don't like toys, then you don't have to use them. What are your stims.
Melissa:Unfortunately, we're talking about harmful stims and I have a horrible history of both grinding my jaw and my teeth, and to the point where I've had multiple surgeries and procedures done on my mouth and my jaw because of stimming. When I'm in hyperfocus I have to have a mouthguard in because it prevents damage on the rest of my jaw. I've been trying to transfer it. I don't know if it's a pressure thing, because if I rub my hands I seem to mentally get the same benefit out of the stim as I do from clenching my teeth. So take it from someone who's been there. It is not fun to have to go through medical intervention.
Melissa:Have you tried weighted vests or like weighted clothing? I prefer like compressive clothing to weighted clothing. I realized too and I don't know if this comes from like I was talking about before being in elementary school, where I was told I couldn't move. But I'll like sit on my hands and that may be compressive as well. I'm exploring my own stims here. Sometimes I'm like I'm not stimming and then I find myself braiding and unbraiding my hair Very common one for girls actually the braiding and unbraiding of hair, Because we tend to have longer hair.
Brianna:It tends to be in a place where we can do it and it's also socially acceptable. Yes, Because there was that whole thing where twirling your hair meant you liked someone and so the boys liked when we did it. So society was like that's a good behavior, you can do that one, You're cute when you do that.
Melissa:Yeah, so we were just talking about harmful stims. If we know we need stimulation or we feel that need, what kind of things can we do to stim?
Brianna:that are very helpful for us. That can be helpful for us. It depends on what environment you're in, right, if you're in an environment where people are accepting and understanding and you're not going to distract anyone else with your stims right, because that's the voluntary piece of it you need to do something that is helpful to you but isn't harmful to other people. It really depends on the situation you're in if you're able to do some of those auditory stems, which actually humming is one of the most beneficial stems, just in general, like that's why meditation has that om chant, because the vibrations actually have physical impacts, like calming down the nervous system. Because you wait, didn't you study this forever?
Melissa:Tell me more about that, culturally, the sounds themselves are actually considered holy or divine. These different beats and tones actually have spiritual energy and connotation. From the medical perspective, it's the exact same thing. Like you're saying, the sound resonance has a positive effect on the nervous system, on the positive chemicals that are flooding the brain. I don't know if you've been around a bunch of Buddhist monks or Hindu monks that are chanting. It sounds amazing.
Brianna:To add to your point, there are certain sound frequencies that also have been demonstrated to have calming effects on the nervous system and then the opposite agitating effects on the nervous system.
Brianna:So it depends To your point. Like I was a part of a choir for years and years and being surrounded by harmony and if you are into music at all, you know that like subharmonics can happen and you know that goosebump feeling that happens when you're surrounded by music, like when you're humming or singing as a stim. You're trying to recreate that calming, soothing effect on your nervous system that music can have. Listening to music also a stim if you're using it to self-soothe right, although if you're just listening to it to have a good time, then that's what the purpose of music is. But if you're listening to it to self-soothe I actually listened to German or Austrian yodeling, which has a lot of harmonies in it and there's, like always, that bass voice in there and for some reason my brain, it just tickles my brain and I get so calm when I listen to that and most people hate yodeling.
Melissa:I'm a member of Audible and they've got a whole free library and I just find the simplest cozy mysteries with somebody reading and I put them on because they're all very formulaic. There's something soothing just about sound going on in the background and I can tune it out. I think that's part of my own auditory stimming and it keeps me focused just listening to something.
Brianna:The other part of that is with ADHD and autism. We want that routine, we want that control, we want that knowledge of where it's going to go, because if it's predictable for us, then it's not scary, it's not in a situation where we would need to react or adjust. We know what's going to happen, we can predict it, so we don't have to be in that heightened state of emotional fight or flight, that listening piece of the self-soothing but also knowing where it's going.
Melissa:As someone with ADHD yourself. How do you stem? Are there favorite things that you do or just ways that you get your energy out? I am very hyperactive outwardly.
Brianna:I will tap my leg, tap my hand, like always need to be moving. I'm like playing with my fingers just beneath the screen here and fidget toys. I do enjoy my cube, my spinner. There's one that I came across. It's like a squishy thing where it's like a video game controller and you squish one side and the like sparkly liquid goes to the other side. You squish it, the sparkly liquid goes to the other side. So it's like a tactile stem. I get to squish. But also I get to like visually see the sparkly liquid go across the like tube system, yeah, and to like briefly go through like a few other ones.
Brianna:There's like the visual stems Like I know a bunch of people have, like salt lamps or there's like flickering candles. There's that galaxy thing, the galaxy projector like projects the galaxy on the ceiling. It's sparkly and it moves a little bit. That one is really interesting. I tried that for a bit. Oh, back to the vocal stems. I hum a lot. I can't beatbox, but I've seen that as a really great stem because it gets the consonants and you can feel the vibrations in the front of your lips, which is really nice. And then tactile. I also really like soft things.
Melissa:So if it's fluffy for me.
Brianna:I like lip and and tongue trills for the vocal stimming oh, I love that and, as I was saying, like candles, some people like smells or things like. There's people who really like perfumes. Also, there's people who again back to the harmful thing will sniff chemicals, which is maybe not the best huge fan of the Mr Sniff and I think cinnamon was my favorite scent, but I I'm talking perma-marker or bleach gasoline, don't smell those, but there are certain people who find that soothing. Yeah, and very briefly, people with ADHD tend to have proprioception and vestibular issues. So I'm talking like balance, clumsiness, that type of thing. It can be a part of ADHD. It can also be trained out, because we talked about Simone Biles in a previous episode. She's an Olympic gymnast with ADHD, so clearly her balance is fine.
Melissa:And I was a dancer and I can be incredibly graceful and, on the other hand, if I'm like not paying attention to what's in front of me, I'm the most clumsy person on the planet, like mystery bruises.
Brianna:Yes, like I walk into door frames so freaking often. But I am an athlete so I don't have any of that clumsiness that my friend that was never an athlete with ADHD has. She trips over everything but like I just walk into door frames. But then when I'm on the soccer field or when I'm doing my sport, like I am very coordinated. So it's something that we have a weakness in that we can overcome if we do physical activity, yoga, et cetera. But there's a test where, if you like, close your eyes, stood on one leg and just tried to hold that pose for a period of time two minutes or something like that like we would sway, like neurodivergent individuals would sway, whereas the neurotypical people would tend to be more upright. Balance is individual right. There are neurotypicals that are clumsy as well. It just tends to be more clumsiness associated with ADHD due to this proprioceptive issues. So saying that swaying motion will like rock back and forth move, it tends to be very self-soothing.
Melissa:My favorite vacations to go on is a cruise being on a boat. There's something about being on a boat that is so soothing and just like being on a boat and looking out over water.
Brianna:Not that I want to be wet, of course, but looking at the water, very soothing, for me it's like swings or like a rocking chair and I know this is very common with like autistic individuals. Like that sensory swing, like it's part of that thing. Or like climbing on monkey bars, hanging upside down. When I'm on a swing, I'll tilt my head back so I can see the sky. I have a hammock literally right over there.
Melissa:I have a hammock right over there that I hang out in when I need to just chill out for a while. Yeah, yeah, if.
Brianna:I'm really in a heightened need to just chill out for a while. Yeah, yeah, if I'm really in a heightened state and if I really need that space, then I will go listen to like music or my yodeling and I will sit in a chair that has some kind of motion to allow myself to self-soothe like that. With ADHD, if all of the neurodivergence is a spectrum, we're slightly more able to navigate our environment. For the most part, again, it's a spectrum're slightly more able to navigate our environment. For the most part, again, it's a spectrum. So everyone is different in their thing. But if you find anything in the autistic community really helpful for you as a person with adhd, go for it. Yeah, I've seen a huge uptick in acceptance over wearing headphones in public. Yeah, so if you're like overstimulated in public and you just want to wear those headphones, that's the other thing.
Melissa:You were mentioning that you hate other people's stims yeah, I have a tendency to hate other people's stims. One of my biggest pet peeves is when people are like fanning their face or moving their hands a lot. It like aggravates some, like some part of my brain and makes me just want to make them stop.
Brianna:I do the hand slapping thing when I am super anxious and overwhelmed.
Melissa:I can't say that I don't do it either, but for some reason someone else doing it bothers me.
Brianna:Yeah, that's the thing Like. When it's me making the loud noise, it's great, when it's other people making the loud noise, it's overstimulating.
Melissa:Yeah, I don't think I could exist right now without my noise canceling earbuds, because it makes me a saner human being. It makes me nicer to everybody too. So often I wonder how weird I am. Am I weird amongst the people with ADHD?
Brianna:I think you're going to find that a lot of people are going to relate to what you just said. For me, it's the opposite. I'll want to join in on the stim, but it really depends on how overstimulated or dysregulated I am in that moment. If I'm regulated and someone else is stimming, it doesn't bother me. If I am dysregulated and someone else is stimming, it doesn't bother me. If I am dysregulated and someone else is stimming, it does bother me because it's another thing in the environment causing overstimulation, right? So it really depends on where you are, how regulated you are, how safe you feel, how anxious you are, and that dictates how you can respond to the environment around you, and the environment around you includes other people's stims.
Melissa:I try to be gracious and be like, okay, they just need to do their thing.
Brianna:But that's part of the voluntary piece of it. That's why I don't think that you should take away people's ability to stim and say, no, sit, still, don't move. Why don't you offer them an alternative? If you are chewing the inside of your cheek, use that little chew toy. If you're picking at your nails, there is pick pads or you can snap a like elastic on your wrist. There are like options. If you're biting your nails, like, paint your nails with something that tastes gross, you can find something that works for you, that doesn't cause harm, doesn't annoy other people. That's the voluntary piece. Right, if you're clicking a pen, get a fidget cube that clicks, that make that same click without the noise. But if it's the noise that's doing it for you, then try and find a situation where you can click without annoying other people. Adhd is a reason, it's not an excuse. So we can't be like oh, you have to deal with my clicking pen or my tapping foot because I need it and it doesn't matter if it annoys you. That's not okay.
Melissa:You're saying that there may be more acceptable ways, or maybe we can transfer some of these stims to something that is maybe more acceptable in a public space where we have to share the space with others.
Brianna:Exactly, yeah. And that goes back to the acceptance versus shame piece. Right, playing with toys at work, even if they are fidget toys, even if they do approve, your focus might be viewed as unprofessional, might be viewed as like you're going to get passed over for the promotion, or you might be socially isolated. If you do these things In the classroom situation, where there's other people in the classroom trying to learn, like doodling is a great alternative. Find something that's quiet, that you can do without disturbing other people.
Melissa:Yeah, in public I'll tap part of my body that's not like super visible, like the back of my knee, because if I'm doing it like in front of people, it seems to grab their attention. I don't necessarily always want the attention on me.
Brianna:If I'm around a bunch of people, that's the other thing right, like you're stimming in a situation where you're feeling overwhelmed, anxious, upset. Something is going on. You're feeling overwhelmed, anxious, upset something is going on. You're feeling dysregulated, you don't want to be drawing attention to you. Like I can't flap my hands in public. That is a very private thing that I do when I'm incredibly overwhelmed and don't know what to do and I'm stuck in a loop. But I can't do that in public because people would notice and I hate it. When I'm already anxious and I already don't want to be perceived and then I'm doing something that's drawing attention to me Never.
Melissa:As much as we want society to be like, do whatever you want. Sometimes we need to find ways to function and do it well, but not impose on others, because sometimes these things can be distracting and imposing on someone else's space and their own mental well-being, and I don't want to be that somebody else. But I also want to make sure that I'm taking care of myself, both mentally and physically. I need to get that physical energy out. If I keep it in, that doesn't help me. That doesn't help my relationships with others around me. I want to find ways for myself to get to be able to do the right things at the right time and just be the best me.
Brianna:I can be the reason we stim is to help ourselves, but we don't want to cause distress to other people. I would love it if society was like yeah, stim all you want, absolutely. And then each individual had the responsibility to be like I care enough about other people and the people around me to not disturb the peace. So today's episode was on stimming. The reason why it's important is because it is a self-regulating behavior.
Melissa:Regulating is a very important word there, because regulating means that makes us the best me we that we can be when we're dealing with other people, Because we need to be regulated to be mentally present and to be emotionally present for others.
Brianna:Yeah, this is why we're talking about stimming. Right, this is the purpose of this episode to draw attention to it even though we don't always want attention on our stimming and to say that it's okay. There are ways you can do it that aren't harmful to yourself or to others, and the reason it exists is this regulating thing, and there is a multitude of things you can use to tons of toys out there. Whatever your interest is like, whatever your type of stim that is the most soothing for you, there's things out there, and if you don't like toys like Melissa, find something else. Get a spinny chair, get a spinny chair. Yeah, you don't have to have anything. Your brain is creative and you will come up with something that allows you to self-regulate.
Melissa:Yeah, you can come up with your own toys or your own functions, and that's okay too.
Brianna:There's just so many options out there and if we can remove some of the shame, some of the stigma, maybe someone listening to this episode is oh, I didn't know it was a stim, or I didn't know it was for self-soothing. And now I can give myself a little space and grace to do this type of behavior and have a reason to explain why it's important, but also still respecting thy neighbor. That's the goal, that's the goal.
Melissa:Thank you for joining us. If you need further resources, Brianna and I are both ADHD coaches. You can find my information at likemindcoachingcom and.
Brianna:Brianna, you can find me at understandingadhdca.
Melissa:And you can find more information about this podcast at hypercastpodcom. Thanks everyone, bye, bye-bye.
